Saturday, November 26, 2005

Desserts that make ya' go Ewwwhhhhhh

They were so bad... I didn't even feel compelled to photograph them. Thanksgiving Day dessert disasters. I planned well.... meant well.... thought all was well until the moment of truth. The slicing and serving.

Damn it. The Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake was requested by my husband. He NEVER requests anything so when he asked me to make this cheesecake I was honored in some weird way. It was like he was entrusting this beautiful ending to his Thanksgiving to me.... like he really believed in my ability to make dessert. He trusted me..... and you guessed it. I screwed it up. Royally. The cheesecake damnation began from the start. I couldn't match up the springforms I have. It was like none of the bottoms fit the tops... and I really wanted to bake it with the bottom upside down so I could get the cheesecake off the pan without much trouble.... but again I couldn't get it to fit right side up, much less upside down. So I gave up and worked with the "frame" a while bending it and finally getting the bottom to fit... sort of. Good enough. The gingersnap and graham cracker crust went okay ( I mean how hard is it to screw up crushed crackers and butter) then came the filling. " Beat 1 cup cold heavy cream until soft peaks form. Place whipped cream into fridge to chill..." got it. No problem there. I popped the cream in the fridge and got on with the rest of it... no problems. Pretty easy, run of the mill cheesecake stuff. Cream cheese, eggs, sugar, pumpkin puree and some spices.... easy pleasey. I poured the cheesecake filling into the pan... ran it a hot bath and into the oven it went..... and I literally said out loud "Well, that was TOO easy. I mean come on...." Then about 10 minutes later I opened the fridge to grab some tea when.... Shit! There was the whipped cream that was supposed to be "folded into the pumpkin cream cheese mixture" sitting there... in the fridge. And the pumpkin cream cheese mixture was baking away in the oven. No no no no no no no no NO NO NO!!!! Not now... not this dessert. Not THE requested Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake... please no. But... yes.
I did the unthinkable.... I actually pulled the baking cheesecake out of the oven and mixed the cold whipped cream in. I know. But I was trying to make this thing perfect and ... well, hell.. edible. I left it alone for the rest of the hour and when the timer went "ding" I did the old "let's test the cheesecake to see if it's done" test. I banged a wooden spoon against the side of the springform to check for firmness on the sides and slight jiggle in the middle. The sides were good... but the center was more than a slight jiggle.... but I figured it was okay because they always say "The cheesecake will continue to cook......" blah blah blah.... Well, this one didn't I find out later. Later when it counts. I let the baby cool... wrapped her in plastic wrap and popped her in the freezer.... to chill until Thursday....
Thursday comes and I have the unusual sense of being on top of things. I take the cheesecake out of the freezer to thaw and get on with the rest of my assigned Thanksgiving foods.... Dinner goes well. The usuals show up..... Turkey, Smoked Ham, Cornbread Dressing, Aunt Faye Salad, Fruit Salad, Sourdough Rolls, Sweet Potatoes, Deviled Eggs, Cranberry Relish, and Sweet Tea. Everything really was delicious. Then comes dessert time... WOO HOO... my time to shine. " Let's cut into that cheesecake shall we?" " Oh yes, let's!" The first cut told a story I didn't want to hear.... " I think this is still raw... I don't think it's done in the middle." " The cheesecake it not done!" " Is it safe to eat raw cheesecake?" " I guess we will have to eat it with a spoon" Even my soon to be two year old who can barely talk said "Cheesecake bad mommy."

My dear husband did try and console me with " It's really good... just a little under done." Yes, honey... it was a little underdone.... just a little.....

Comments on "Desserts that make ya' go Ewwwhhhhhh"

 

Blogger Nic said ... (November 26, 2005 10:48 AM) : 

Oh no! I am guessing that there aren't any words I can offer that will be particularly consoling, so I'll just say that you should try again. Bake it until the center is a little jiggly, but mostly set. The center shouldn't move completely independently of the rest of the cake.
I'm sure it'll turn out well next time. And besides, you know it can't turn out worse than the first one!

 

Blogger Alicat said ... (November 26, 2005 12:36 PM) : 

oh poor chan! that really stinks!

but I have to admit, Kathryns quote made me laugh so hard! :) hehe...so sad, but so funny. ;)

Shit happens...ugh, always at the worst times, no? keep your chin up girl! :)

 

Blogger chronicler said ... (November 26, 2005 2:28 PM) : 

Oh Chnadra! I am so sorry tis happened to you! USually these things happen to me! Always when someone special is around too! Ugh. Hey you know what they say, three's a charm! One more before it's perfection!

 

Anonymous LisaSD said ... (November 26, 2005 8:59 PM) : 

Chan--I feel your pain!! I cannot tell you how many times I've left out an ingredient. Just about everytime I make something. Seriously.

What Would Paula Do? LOL

She'd probably add butter!

 

Blogger Culinarily Obsessed said ... (November 27, 2005 11:07 PM) : 

Awww sorry to hear your dessert didn't come out as planned. That totally sounds like something I would have done - forgotten to add the whipped cream.

Hope the rest of your holiday was wonderful. Better luck next time!

 

Anonymous Janice said ... (November 28, 2005 3:58 AM) : 

Oh, dear! So sorry about that. But, at least you know what you did wrong. I tried Bourbon Kentucky Derby Pie this year for 1st time -- for some reason it flopped. I have no idea where I screwed up?? But, I had other things so everyone wasn't sitting there with fork in hand waiting for me to cut it. Better luck next time. (the post was funny, tho).

 

Anonymous Anonymous said ... (November 28, 2005 7:58 AM) : 

So sorry!
Emily aka biscuits and blues

 

Anonymous Anonymous said ... (November 30, 2005 4:53 PM) : 

Chan I am new to reading your blog.. and this was the funniest blog yet! I love reading your blogs because you do not beat around the bush and let us know exactly what you are thinking! Let us know if you ever try this recipe again and how it turned out! I have to say I love all of those mixers... where do you purchase them? Have a great holiday season and happy baking!
A fond reader from the East!

 

Blogger Mona said ... (December 01, 2005 12:22 PM) : 

oh goodness, my condolences. i hate when you get all excited about cooking something new and you want it to be the next best thing to biting into heaven and then it goes flippity (or in your case jiggly) flop. don't fret my friend. you'll just know what to do for the next time. i guess my mom's right...she says never make anything cold turkey for anything important. always try it out on yourself first.

 

Blogger gini said ... (December 01, 2005 3:27 PM) : 

Chandra...this was such a fun read. Makes me feel better about my attempts at baking cakes. I made one for a new mom, decorated with coconut flakes. It looked totally great and when we finally cut into it, it was not cooked..I turn red whenever I think about it..

 

Blogger s'kat said ... (December 07, 2005 10:25 AM) : 

I think you need a holiday cheescake redux. Bake it for no other reason than to triumphantly surprise him!

 

Blogger Stepped in Cupcake Batter said ... (December 08, 2005 1:09 PM) : 

S'kat said it best,
Come on Chan!!!!!

 

Blogger Chan said ... (December 10, 2005 11:02 AM) : 

i am going to face this cheesecake again soon... tonight or tomorrow.. i will keep you posted!
thanks for the encouragement!
c

 

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